I just feel alone, why? I don't have friends. Nope. Zilch. I just don't like things that most people like and my social skills is absolute zero. I have nothing to talk about with others. I try to react more positively and reach out to others more but I couldn't, I am too shy to social with others. Hence I do stay alone a lot more these days.
I wonder how long I can hold on to my mental capability of doing a lot of work consistently before I collapse under the mental drain it gives to me. Really, I doubt I would be able to take that much because I don't want to hurt my mental health for too much.
I'm not a smart person but I am capable of getting good scores, just that I am lacking the effort and the mental capability needed to even go higher. I need to work on my mental capability to keep myself consistent for the years ahead and really to pick up my work ethic as I don't really do enough work at home to allow me more mentally capable of getting a higher score.
I can do easy maths like factorising quadratic equation but it's another question when it comes to harder stuff like vectors, calculus and cubic functions. They require me to put in a lot of effort and time to actually get fluent and comfortable at doing those more complex maths. I should put really more time into doing maths than before and really try to do every question possible to make myself more capable, efficient and comfortable like I do now in quadratic functions.
Physics is more or less the same at maths. Looking at the Unit 3 test I failed. I realises there's a lot more to do to get me even more comfortable at Physics as I never felt comfortable at doing physics because of Mr Bushby and Mr Chu. I don't even understand the background of the theory and how to apply them into real-life situations. That really requires me to read a lot more on physics.
Here comes the important question, Can I keep up reading a lot more extra about Physics? It will be a question that I need to take a deep look at and eventually I have to realise how useful would the extra reading.
It takes a lot more than a capable mind to perform consistently and I need to be aware of that.
Really, should stop swearing but hell it's going to be hard. Even more so with a uber Computer Geek who reads a lot of rants and get killed a lot on the internet everyday. Also, It's very very hard to find a male over 15 who doesn't swear a lot.
But really, I should stop before it gets out of control...